Simply put, parenting can be an incredibly challenging ordeal. More often than most parents would like to admit, it’s common to resort to reacting to a child’s tantrum or poor behaviour, rather than observing and then responding. So how can parents learn to keep their cool in exceptionally difficult situations? And is it even possible – regardless of what the endless articles on mindfulness and meditation may say – to always have the presence of mind to respond to your children in admirable way?
A toddler is having a tantrum in the middle of a busy grocery store. A flung open bathroom door leads to a scene where a grade-school child has given themselves a haircut with safety scissors. In these fraught situations, it’s understandable to react immediately. Reacting is an immediate response that often occurs without taking the time to pause and reflect. As such, a flood of feelings and emotions lead to a reaction. This flood occurs due to a perceived safety issue, or as a result of some deeper hot spots or triggers that have gone unresolved in our own minds.
Responding, on the other hand, is a comparably more empowering approach. The act of responding invites us to take a step back, pause, evaluate the situation and then decide on the most meaningful and mutually-beneficial way to proceed. Remember the toddler having a tantrum? Perhaps it’s because the overstimulation in the grocery store feels overwhelming. And the haircut? There was that story about a school bully who had a rather unkind word to say.
Aside from exhaustion and the other stressors inherent in daily parental life, your child’s behaviour may cause a heightened reaction for a variety of reasons. Your child may behave in a way that:
Mindful parenting is the ability to stay rooted to what is happening in the present, rather than be drawn in by the emotions, past memories and other thoughts passing through one’s mind at any given moment. What’s brilliant about this approach is that it means letting go of shame, guilt and other emotions that might not be helpful in the moment – and emphasizing the importance of what is in front of you.
Mindfulness is often incorrectly considered to be a religious practice, a way of controlling or ignoring one’s own needs, thoughts and feelings or about positive thinking. On the contrary, people of all backgrounds unknowingly engage in mindfulness practices – regardless of their personal beliefs. In addition, the practice of mindfulness is about acknowledging your emotions and observing them without passing judgement or trying to make them feel more positive. This means simply recognizing that you’re frightened, stressed or anxious.
The fundamental tenets of mindful parenting are:
Research indicates that parents who reported more mindful parenting engaged in more effective parenting strategies, rather than negative ones. In turn, their children were more likely to demonstrate more positive behaviours.
Exercising mindful parenting may have several benefits, including:
Brightlobe specialises in game-based digital diagnostic tools for neurodevelopmental conditions, like autism and ADHD. We empower families and children by reducing time to diagnosis and cost, and provide clinicians with precision insight for greater diagnostic accuracy.
Brightlobe © 2023. All Rights Reserved.
Site built by Shiv.